regrets + goals

Why you should stop saying sorry


I am learning how to stop saying I am sorry. Sick of having the automatic response in all moments where I feel slightly bad for the person or people involved in my choices.

it means nothing

Think about it, even when you have no control over the situation you end up saying sorry. Like at work, where it is not your fault you don’t have something and say the word when it is not even your responsibility to make sure you have it! Why are you apologizing then? The statement is such a meaningless impulse. We say it just because we know it is polite – but how often do we actually mean it? In my opinion, saying the word makes it obvious you are guilty. Taking responsibility. Admitting you had control in the outcome. Do you? If so, is it necessary to waste time saying sorry? Probably better to use the energy to fix the problem.

actions speak louder than words


…but, I am sorry!

When is it ok to say it? When you genuinely mean it! . When it is 100% your fault for messing up and are ready to follow with the actions necessary to make up for your mess. Never say sorry for something you have been wanting to do or say. You are an adult and can make your own decisions. The word is for the chain of events following your decisions.

So yes, I may slip up and say sorry when I do not mean it because I have been programmed to do so. However, I am going to make a conscious effort to save my sorry’s for times when I genuinely mean it. If someone decides to read this and you can relate – try it! Using actions to apologize rather than saying a word. See what happens…


secrets , , Comments Off on Why you should stop saying sorry

What You Think


What you think, you become. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you create. – Buddha

This is that moment you think…I knew this was going to happen. You thought, felt and imagined your reality. Whatever is in your mind controls your actions, obviously you are always choosing, but you are bias to your inner dialogue.

Lets dissect the Buddha quote.

…what you think…you become…

Keep affirming negative and get negative. Keep affirming positive and get positive. Simple. But, how do you control your thoughts? -easiest way- surround yourself with all the good. Figure out what you need, pull it into your life and hold it tight. Gather the good and throw out the bad.

…what you feel…you attract…

What makes you feel shitty? Know it, remember it, and avoid it! Feel fat, eat more, feel tired, sit around. Eat healthy, feel healthy, workout, feel amazing, love yourself, feel like the best version of yourself. Feel good! No matter what ailment – emotional or physical – find a way to appreciate your body and mind + treat it with the most respect.

…what you imagine…you create…

Day dreaming is for adults too! Where do you escape in your mind. As you go through your day, you have your escapes – oh, I wish I had a better/nicer job/car/place. Think of the details and visualize. Focus on that, focus on how good your escape feels and how much better it will feel when it is your reality.

I’ve spent my 23 years realizing this is true, always promising myself and to stay positive, but breaking down when times get rough. Those negative thoughts suffocate the good and have lead me to my new reality…my lowest low.

Time to bounce back.

Time to restart and send out the positive vibes to attract the positive. Excited and nervous. Nervous because I am so used to the negative, it is going to hard to accept the amazingness that I know is to come and I deserve.

Wish me luck…


secrets , , Comments Off on What You Think

Acceptance: Break Ups and Moving Forward


Life is dynamic, changing based on an infinite amount of variables. Some changes are so easy to accept and others take heaps of courage to comprehend.

A relationship starts off beautiful and exciting, positively moving forward – creating memories and enduring what life throws your way. Then the fights begin, the name calling and finger pointing.

Respect is lost and you need to make a change, but how? when?

The arguments get louder and more hurtful, you realize you lost that beautiful and exciting feeling. You are maybe not going backward, but you are definitely at a standstill.

Ending anything is scary, the normal comfort you had for so long ends and you have to deal. No running away from the flashbacks, the good and bad memories.

Maybe there is still love, but love is not enough. Love does not stop us from causing pain. We hurt the ones we love the most. The expectation is an unconditional acceptance, but in reality we have limits and if someone blows it – change is inevitable.

You do not know what you have until it is gone…that is when the acceptance factor comes in to play.

Mourning the loss of a person who is still alive is hard to accept, the coping mechanisms vary from healthy to self destructive.

How do you move forward, leaving a person you thought was going to be with you for life?

  • remember the good
  • remember the bad
  • say a mantra – my future is filled with love, I am worthy, my heart is open for new experiences

You learn how to live again, doing your own thing, following your own heart and motivations.

On this new journey, you accept the future and focus on the positive changes you are experiencing due to the beautiful disaster that was your past relationship.


relationships , , Comments Off on Acceptance: Break Ups and Moving Forward